The Best Baby Shower

A couple weekends back, I had the distinct honor of attending one of the best baby showers that ever was. The shower was really just a formal component of a regular old (and very, very informal) crafting weekend and had been in the works ever since we learned at the last crafting weekend that two of our "gang of eight" were expecting their first babies within ten days of each other.(Royal babies and crafting babies this summer, oh my!) To honor the two very special mamas-to-be, we wanted to hold a baby shower that showered them with handmade baby items.

It was truly a shower where every present was even more incredible than the last. The mamas received personalized picture books, binders of their baby's genealogy, beautiful quilts and burp clothes, and of course, lots of knit goods. As for really practical things like diapers and teething rings, they'll have to wait for a shower where people actually follow a registry. ;)

Remember those sheep cardigans? Dubbed "The Dirty Lionel Cardigan" after a sheep we named while we were all in Ireland together (five of us studied abroad in Ireland during Spring 2005), the cardigans finally made it to their owners.

Let's see if they fit!

As is to be expected at an event where everyone has a bit of a flair for the creative and homemade, the food was delicious. I'm still dreaming about the lemon curd filled cupcakes, although let me tell you, the chocolate ones weren't half bad either. Even the party favors were homemade: jars of strawberry margarita jam. Oh nom nom nom.

Games and activities were kept low-key and we avoided poop themes (no baby food was wasted at this baby shower) and any "who knows the mom best" sort of games. One of the favorite activities was decorating onesies with puff paint. I'm not sure how many onesies a new mom needs, but you can rest assured that these two mamas-to-be now have onesies - mostly covered in movie quotes or inside jokes - coming out of their ears.

Of course, the baby shower, as wonderful as it was, was just one teeny bit of a four day (!!! hold the phones!) weekend that included a surprise birthday party with an Anchorman theme, s'mores, Skittles, Wimbledon (and Pimm's Cup and strawberries and cream -heaven!), playing on the playground just down the road, evening walks, Pitch Perfect, and so much noise and laughter. I'm so lucky to be part of this wonderful tribe of women!

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Me and the Winter Blahs

If I let winter get the better of me, by mid-January, I can be one big miserable mess. After a particularly weepy winter during my junior year of college, I knew I needed to pay a little closer attention to my mental health this time of year. While I hesitate to call this penchant for the winter gloomys full-blown seasonal affective disorder (I mean, what Minnesotan isn’t a little SAD?) I have enough self-awareness to realize that when the dark, cold winter days start to wear away at me, I need some diversions and distractions to help the season pass.

Some years, I find relief from the winter blahs in the Winter Olympics. Other years writing dates and work outside of the home have kept me from my winter wallowing. This winter? It’s salvation by Broadway Across America. Back in April when I bought season tickets with my friend Sarah to the 2012-13 Broadway on Tour season at the Orpheum in Minneapolis, the decision seemed a little impulsive and a bit fiscally frivolous. But even then, just as spring was about to burst into full bloom, I knew I was already fighting against this winter’s blahs.

Last weekend, Sarah and I went to the third performance of the season: Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. (Soooo much better than Catch Me If You Can which we attended last month, but still not quite as good as the season opener: Beauty and the Beast.) I ended up spending an extra night in the Cities because I left on Thursday instead of Friday to avoid a nasty ice storm. It turned out to be the right decision because the roads were so bad that Andy ended up staying home from that Friday because he literally could not make it to work.

Here’s another winter blah beating tip: I lead a stress management seminar one time and I remember one of the tips was “improve your appearance.” After not cutting my hair in more than two years (go ahead, judge me), I hit up a salon in the Cities last weekend and got a good six inches hacked off. (Ahhh!) It’s amazing how something as simple as not having split ends can make you feel so much more together and on top of things.

Because our tickets were for the Saturday matinee, after the performance we battled a bitter north wind for a meal at The Melting Pot, the fondue restaurant on 9th Street. I’d never been before and we had a great time enjoying a four course meal of cheese, salad, meat, and dessert. That said, considering the price tag and the rather homogenous meal, I’d rather give my return business to some place with a little more personality. Or else, I’d probably just go back for appetizers or dessert. I don’t know about you, but I’m perfectly capable of cooking meat in a boiling pot of chicken broth (basically what the main entrée consists of) at home.

We’d planned to visit the ice castle down at the Mall of America after the meal, but embarrassing as it is to admit, these two native Minnesotans weren’t wearing enough clothes to make an hour or so of standing outdoors in temperatures in the mid-teens with a howling wind a great option. Last Saturday was the first “normal Minnesota January” day after a string of days with temps above freezing and I hadn’t left the house wearing the long underwear and down vests necessary for a pleasant visit to a structure constructed wholly of icicles. Maybe we’ll make it to the ice castle next month when I’m down to attend The Book of Mormon (eeeeee!).

What do you do to shake the winter blahs?
 

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Happy New Year - Alternative Title: Friends Laughing Together

Happy New Year everyone!

Here we are, three days into the new year already and I've yet to even wish you all well for this new exciting year we're just embarking on. Like so many bloggers, I have a tendency to fall off the face of the earth during the holiday season. Amazingly (shockingly?) enough, the holidays are rapidly coming to a close (to me, it all ends on January 6 - Epiphany, which is my traditional "take down all Christmas decorations day") and today is my first attempt to return to a normal work schedule. Considering that I oversleep (fail), I have a feeling that today will be all about little successes and getting my head back into the work game, while tomorrow will be the first day I actually have billable hours again. Speaking of billable hours, I should really send out some invoices today. (Oh hey there Christmas credit card bill.)

There have been plenty of little, not really work related, but definitely "real" life things waiting for my attention. QuickBooks is updated, I've gotten the car in for a long overdue oil change and my annual physical appointment is scheduled. Yesterday, Andy and I did laundry for the first time in earnest since the first week in December and I'm over the moon about the prospect of clean underwear, clean socks, and clean pants!

I hope that Christmas (if that's the holiday you celebrate) was a very happy day for you and that you're looking forward to 2013 as much as I am. I really have no idea what 2013 will bring -probably just more of the same - but since 2012 was a very happy year around these parts, I say, "Bring it, 2013."

Essential items for New Year celebrating: poppers, hat, and a crazy straw for your champagne

I was lucky enough to celebrate New Year's with my crafting/Ireland/college buddies this year. We officially have way too much fun together. This year's "New Year's Crafting Weekend" spanned three nights and brought us all to the Minnesota prairie in Willmar - or as I and my fellow northern MN crafters referred to it: "Garrison's Minnesota". Willmar's a fair poke from my neck of the woods (hooray for carpooling!), but the time spent together was worth every minute in the car(s). We realized that this is the 6th crafting get-together - to date we've had three summer crafting "weekends" and three New Year celebrations.

One of our fellow crafters had gotten married this past fall and because our lives are typically not nearly as awesome as they appear during crafting weekends, most of us missed the wedding. To make up for this, we decided to throw a surprise second wedding reception.

Interestingly enough, this is the second event of this holiday season for me missing a key player of the event. There was no baby mama at the surprise baby shower last month and the groom was conspicuously absent during this "second" wedding reception.

"Wedding" cake

A major reason why we hosted a second reception was to present the bride with her wedding present - the handknit afghan that we hadn't been able to finish in time for the actual wedding.

Who am I kidding, we barely finished the afghan in time for the second wedding reception. I spent Friday evening sitting on the floor in the basement of some friends' mother's home, sewing on border. Despite my earlier moaning and groaning, the afghan turned out beautifully and I'm really happy we were able to make it happen.

 

Family photo of everyone in their "wedding" clothes

You may be noticing that there aren't too many pictures of actual crafting. That's because we were usually too busy doing this to get much crafting done:

There was some crafting accomplished though. A Civil War era ball gown skirt was worked on and there was much knitting, including my knitting 8 gazillion (okay, 12) owl cozies for the Etsy shop. Check out the new colors: tutu pink, a mustard yellow/gold, and a dark blue heather.

Braving 0 degree weather to trace a sewing pattern

It's always hard to come back to "real" life after the holiday season, but it just can't be party, party, party all day, every day, I suppose. *sigh*

So far, I'm not resolving to do anything this year other than take care of myself and live life happily and fully. Whatever your New Year resolutions, I wish you the best of luck with them and I hope 2013 goes down as one of our best to date.

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Holiday Traditions

I spent a little time this week thinking about holiday traditions that have developed in my life over the years. As I made a mental list, I was surprised by a pretty obvious trend: my holiday traditions center around friendships rather than family.

Source: fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net via Nicolas on Pinterest

I suppose it's silly to be shocked by this revelation. My maternal grandparents were snowbirds during almost my entire childhood and as their only grandchildren, we didn't develop any holiday traditions on that side of the family, although we usually did (and do) have one sort of holiday gathering with my aunt and uncle. My father's family all hails from Chicagoland and although Christmas trips to Chi-town dominate my childhood holiday memories, since both my brother and I graduated high school, our trips to Chicago have become increasingly infrequent and less tied to the holiday season.So, for the time being, friends get to dominate my holiday season. It's quite lovely.

Here's a list of some of my favorite holiday traditions:

An annual wine, cheese, and gab fest with the girls from my college's student newspaper. For a bunch of former muckrakers, we clean up rather nicely. ;) This year's get-together is tomorrow. Eeeee! Excitement!

Make a batch of shitballs (peanut butter balls) with my friend Sarah. We've been making these each Christmas (although sometimes not until February, depending on how accommodating our schedules are) since we were sophomores in college, when we made the dreadful mistake of adding water to our melted chocolate. (Oh, the culinary mistakes one makes at age 19.) The chocolate ceased and our peanut balls took on a less than appetizing appearance, although I remember them still tasting pretty good. You say, shitballs. I say, warm Christmas feelings.  

Of course holiday movies factor into my Christmas traditions. Each season I like to watch Love Actually by myself or with my mom, Elf with anyone who happens to be around, and The Holiday . . . because Jude Law in glasses totally makes up Cameron Diaz's less than amazing performance. I got pretty brunt out A Christmas Story during my teenage years, but it's still a classic, I will watch a scene or two if it's on in the background.

The annual craft-o-thon over New Year's with a wonderful group of women bonded by crafts, college, and Ireland is a newer (and wonderful) addition to my holiday festivities. The picture below is the only one I could find in my files where we all look relatively normal. And trust me, any appearance of normalcy is clearly a facade.

Find the perfect Christmas tree with Andy. We have yet to do this. We've been holiday spirit procrastinators this year.

Not quite a holiday tradition yet since I've only done it twice, but I do try to make a batch of potato latkes at some point during Hanukkah each year.

 
What are some of your holiday traditions?
 

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Still, Still, Still

Oh, I have a blog? After a good solid month+ of blogging, I kind of dropped the ball this past week. Whoops.

I hate to use the same ol' tired excuse over and over again, but things have been busy around here. Like mindblowing-ly busy. I've been working steadily away at freelance projects, trying to stay on top of things with the 9-5 ish  job, and sorting out the holiday season. Throw in the fact that we're still a one-car household (which is making some holiday travel plans tres complicated) and I'm feeling a bit like not enough butter across too much toast.

Andy mentioned this past week that we run to town the most during the months of November and December. (I'd argue that we also do a fair amount of running around in late April and early May.) These are the times when I'm not working full time and the roads are often in decent conditions. Depending on the season, we spend these trips gathering supplies for venison processing or gardening, spending time with family and friends, appointments that have been pushed off during the summer (oh hey there dentist) and doing extensive work on projects that are left simmering over the summer season. Summers are historically hectic in a rather predictable way. Come the shoulder seasons and all bets are off for what any given week (or day) will contain.

It's funny that just when a sense of stillness is descending on the woods, we're really ramping things up. Over the last week, the lake froze over. With steady snowfall at the moment, we won't be ice skating this winter - the snow reacts with the ice and puts a quick end to any "smooth as glass" ice conditions.  

I don't know that I'm doing a very good job of preparing my heart for Advent this year. I've been spending the days since Thanksgiving caught up in the minituia of my weekly to-do lists and the details of travel plans. This week I need to step back and look at the big picture.

Over the last week, most of the snow we received over Thanksgiving melted away in a warm snap. This morning, the snow falls quietly and steadily outside my window, obscuring the far shore with a veil of white. I've been busy sorting out little details that have been niggling at the back of my mind over the last month of so.My TracFone is reactivated, my bus ticket to this coming weekend's festivities booked, the majority of holiday presents bought.

In less than a week I will be spending time with friends I hardly ever see, my brother will be home for a long weekend, I get to enjoy another Broadway show with a very close friend, and many friends and family members are helping these holiday reunions happen. As always, blessings are many when you stop to count them.

It seems oh so appropriate that "Still, Still, Still" is the holiday song that keeps running through my mind this season:  

Still, still, still,
One can hear the falling snow.
For all is hushed,
The world is sleeping,
Holy Star its vigil keeping.
Still, still, still,
One can hear the falling snow.

It's difficult for all of us to find stillness during the holiday season, but if we are to survive the holidays with any shred of good humor left on New Year's Day, then we must learn to take a moment each day to create a stillness in our hearts. I hope the start of the holiday season has been treating you well and that you're all finding moments to catch your breath!

 

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No Regrets, Except . . .

I like to think I have a fairly regret free life.  Sure, it would have been fun to have channeled my inner Rory Gilmore and gone to an Ivy League College. And perhaps an English major was just a touch too romantic. A high paying (permanent) job with a magazine or newspaper would have been nice and I would have loved to have lived on the East Coast for at least a little while.

But for the most part, I'm where I am today as a result of the decisions I've made; some which simply seemed like the best choice at the time and others that I'm pretty darn proud. I don't have much time for the "shoulda, woulda, coulda" nature of regrets. As much as I'm sure we'd all like to fiddle a little with our past, in the end, all any of us can do is deal what we have at our disposal at this very moment.  

You know, carpe dium and all of that crap.

But during the summer months, when I head back to work full time, I become plagued with regrets. Regrets of a very specific nature:

Source: etsy.com via Rachel on Pinterest

I am always so sad to miss it. Always.

When you only work full-time 24 months out of the year, additional days off have less than great fiscal results. (Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, eh?) And when you work weekends and just happen to be the only employee at your work place, you end up with one inflexible work schedule. (Swap shifts, what?) It doesn't matter how far in advance you send your "Save the Date" card; if your special event happens on a weekend during the months of May - October, chances are, I won't be able to celebrate with you. (Btw: whatever happened to December weddings? I hear they're lovely *hint, hint, nudge, nudge*)

I was listening to NPR's Talk of the Nation earlier this month, when Jennifer Ludden talked with Charles Wheelan about his 10 Things You Won't Hear At Commencement. (If you haven't bumped into this list somewhere on the internets already, it's worth checking out.) In the essay, Wheelan points out that the most valuable time we spend at college probably isn't doing homework or attending classes, but instead is time we spend connecting with our peers over extracurriculars and building friendships that will extend well beyond our college days. At the end of the day, our social connections will add much more value to our lives than the number on the right side of our pay checks.

But we Americans have sneaky habit of valuing work out over friendship. As Wheelan (or some caller) pointed out in the interview, we wouldn't think twice about canceling a coffee date if we needed to work overtime at work. But cancel work for a coffee date? Ha!  

Even though my hands feel tied when it comes stealing away from work during the summer months, it gnaws at me that work always get the upper hand. When I send my regrets, it feels unavoidable and inevitable and yes, regrettable. . . to me. But how does it feel to the recipient of my regrets? 

I worry that when I send my regrets, I'm sending more than just a response to an invitation. I worry that I'm also sending a message to the sender that their friendship doesn't mean enough to me for me to clear time in my schedule to attend. Busy schedules excuse absences for a bit, but when you consistently miss friends' big days? It's enough to make us all wonder where my priorities truly lie.

So no, I don't have any regrets, except the ones I'll be sending to your baby shower, bridal shower, anniversary party, birthday party, wedding ceremony, bar mitzah, (etc. etc.) over the next five months.

And in so many ways, those are the very worst kind of regrets a person can have. 

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The Freelance Writing Trenches: Network

You should be networking as a freelance writer. You really should. What with it being the era of social media and all, you really have no excuse.

You know. it's funny. As a girl who has reached her (gasp) late 20s, I've watched my Facebook feed evolve drastically over the last seven years. What started out as a random assortment of mostly amusing postings from classmates at my alma mater has now been overtaken by applications, postings from my friends' moms, and pictures of the babies of the people I haven't talked to in years. Connections that seemed so vital back in the day end up looking almost superficial after a few years and miles are between the two of you.

When I'm in a hasty mentality, I'll poo-poo Facebook as silly and unnecessary. But when I'm in a more objective mood, I can see that Facebook has allowed me to stay in touch with some very important people.

The thing is, when I originally "friended" them, oh, six or seven years ago, I knew I'd probably never them again after graduation. (And I haven't.)  I never imagined they'd be so important. But the mere fact that we've all pursued freelance writing and been able to keep in touch through the wonder of social media has made these individuals indispensable contacts.

You hear on any career building website how important it is to network. In fact, the word "network" kind of makes me glaze over. But I do think it behooves freelancers greatly, no matter where they're at with their careers, to stay in touch with fellow professionals who are following in similar footsteps.

Here's three reasons why:

Companionship:
Freelancing is lonely business. Sure, you'll get out of the house for an in-person interview every now and then, but most of your work is done through phone calls and emails. What's more, if you're a freelancer, you probably get this a lot when you explain the whole query/write for pay process: "Wow . . . that's . . . so . . . interesting. I didn't know you could do that." When you have someone you can contact who understands how you make your living (and not just in the "oh, good for you" way), you feel a little more legitimate and a lot less prone to spontaneously bursting out into a heart-wrenching version of "All By Myself." 

Competition:
If I wasn't passive aggressive, I'd call this reason "accountability" but the truth of the matter is, I like winning. (Maybe that's why Andy refuses to play cribbage with me anymore?) But when you're self-employed, there's no such thing as raises and promotions. Without any external forces pushing you to work harder, it can be easy to fall into the trap of thinking "hey, there was enough money to pay for groceries this month, who needs more than that?" But when you send off an update to one of your writer friends and they reply by telling you that they recently broke into the New York Times, you're presented with one of those "now wait a minute , , ," moments where you realize if they can do it, there's no reason why you can't either.  

Collaboration 
When you stay in touch with other freelance writers, you have an opportunity to share your experiences, yes, but also your contacts. Success in freelance writing depends to a certain extent on having an "in" with an editor. Most of that time, you're depending on a great story idea to land you a gig, but every once in a while, you'll get tipped off about a particular publication by another writer.  I've landed more than one job from a lead I got just from checking in with a fellow freelancing colleague. Classic scratch my back and I'll scratch yours. 

I don't have any specific formula to my networking, although I will say my most helpful networking has been with people who are in a similar stage of their freelance writing career as me. Still, there's value in networking with people who are just starting out (you will learn something just by answering their questions) as well as those who have reach that pinnacle of success you aim for. Many people recommend networking once a week. I find once a month is more attainable for me and enough to keep me on track with my goals.

Moral of the story: keep in touch. Shoot a writer you admire an email. Send a college classmate who's gone into a similar career a Facebook or Twitter message. You never know what doors might open as a result of your correspondence.

 

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Murderous Good Fun

As seems to be the norm anymore, we spent the weekend away from the cabin. On Friday morning, we all schlepped south to the metro. Andy had family gatherings to attend. I had a murder planned for Saturday night.

Since college graduation (which she did a year ahead of schedule because she's obnoxious like that), my friend Sarah's been working some pretty crazy hours as a public accountant. We're talking 70-80 hour work weeks on average and if that's not cause enough to go mildly homicidal, I'm not sure what is. We all know the true test of friendship, right? A friend helps you move. A good friend helps you move a body.

But back in April, right before we took on the Windy City together, Sarah got a new job, one with "I can still lead a human life" hours. So in celebration of all sorts of things - birthdays, friends and time to enjoy both - Sarah decided to throw a murder mystery dinner party before the holidays really set in.

When I've tried to explain what a "mystery in a box" dinner party was over the last couple months, I've been greeted with a lot of blank stares.  For whatever reason, despite never having attended such a party, I was familiar with the concept. Too much time spent reading mail-order catalogs as a child, I guess. If you're not familiar, the basic premise is that all the dinner guests play characters who have all been at the scene of murder which happened right before the game begins. All the characters have a motive for killing the imaginary murder victim, but only one character's actually committed the crime. Over the course of the dinner, clues are revealed until finally the (predetermined) murderer is discovered. It's like a live action game of Clue.

If you've seen Sarah's house, you know she has a bit of a passion for Asian decor. Naturally, she selected a murder mystery set in 1910 Hong Kong.  This was a great idea for several reasons. It requires very little decoration other than popping together and stringing some paper lanterns. Also, Chinese food is easy to produce in mass quantities. It did however mean that we - Sarah, her high school friend Kristen, and I - spent all of Saturday morning constructing a kimono for Sarah. (We mixed and matched Asian cultures a bit - the night ended with a cake shaped like sushi which another friend brought and was delicious.)

Two signs a party's bound to succeed? Sake and drink umbrellas.

Dinner table set for twelve guests.

A break between rounds.

The happy hostesses.

I found my dress on etsy. It's kimono inspired, but in no way Hong Kong 1910 - more Thailand 2011, I'd say. But hey, if I'm going to shell out my hard-earned money, it's going to be on something I'm going to wear again. I know Sarah feels the same way. Pretty sure she's going to be a geisha for like the next ten Halloweens.

In the end, I wasn't the actual character who committed the murder (whew!) and a pretty fantastic time was had by all. All our prep work in the kitchen in the early afternoon really paid off when it came to get the dinner courses out and although no one took the game to seriously (case in point, one of the guys did the entire game in a German accent when a Chinese accent alluded him) everyone played along and enjoyed the ridiculousness of it all. Murder's never been so fun. 

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Oh Those Wedding Bells

I finally turned a corner with this whole wedding thing. It's no secret that I've had some anxieties and neuroses to deal with when it comes a dear friend's wedding on Saturday. There's nothing like having both the mandatory strapless bra and Andy's "dress" clothes arrive with plenty of time to spare before the big day (and have them all fit) to really calm you down for someone else's big day.

Now that I'm a picture of serenity and calm, Andy and I are ready, we are set to head to central Minnesota for the biggest, bestest Lutheran wedding bash of them all. Granted there are few things to worry about. It better be cold, because Andy's wedding appropriate wear consists of khaki pants, a chamois shirt and wool sweater.  And I had better start practicing my readings for the wedding or else I'm going to have phrases like "exquisite excitements" twisting my tongue in every which way.

In the last couple days, I've stopped looking at the wedding as obligation and started seeing it as an opportunity. An opportunity to spend some time with some of my favorite people in the world:

Hard to believe we're all old enough to be married, engaged, or otherwise attached, but I think Charlotte from Sex and the City said it best: "Maybe we could be each other’s soul mates. And men could be these great, nice guys to have fun with."

Oh those wedding bells are ringing and Andy and I are on our way to make a toast or two. 

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